Find Your Nights

     It was one of those nights. It was late about 12:30 when I finally hopped in my yellow bug to leave a friends house. I rolled my windows because it is July and my car's A/C has stopped working ( but hey at least it's an excuse to keep the windows down all the time). I pulled up my Spotify, knowing I needed something to listen to on the way home and suddenly felt it. It was one of those nights.
   Nights like these always come. It doesn't matter where I am, what time of night it is, or what season of life I'm in. They come. I've had a playlist of exactly 8 songs (link for the playlist is here), that for years now I've shuffled through on these kind of nights. They're all worship songs, ranging from different artists, but songs I've held very dear and near to my heart.
    As the first one starts fading into the speakers I know the night has begun. It's only me, the starry sky above me, and God. These kind of nights are the moments when I feel most alone, but at the same time completely surrounded by God's presence. It's where I for once drive the speed limit on the highway, letting other cars pass so I can hear each and every song before I arrive home.
    Within the first couple of seconds I'll start to sing, and as I start to dive into a time of just worship I start to sing louder and louder. Until I'm practically scream singing the songs with everything in me. These nights I get that same feeling you do when surrounded by millions of people all raising their hands worshipping, but yet it's only me all alone on the freeway.
     These nights are the nights where I feel closest to God. Not in front of an renowned christian band with fog lights and lasers. No I feel closet in the simplicity of these nights. With not a soul in sight it makes me feel very small driving alone with the big expanse of sky above me. It makes remember how absolutely insane and powerful and mighty God is.
      These nights are special. No matter the season of life I'm in or the sin I'm struggling with, the songs always hit me just as hard and I leave my car feeling the exact same peace in my overflowing heart as before. These drives also usually end up in me crying (I've always been a person who's easily moved to tears), whether from a struggle I'm facing or tears of joy. It's refreshing because sometimes life gets so busy and frustrations get all so bottled up I need a good, solid cry every now and then.
     We live in such a hectic life thats always in a rush. It's hard for lots of people to find time to spend in God's presence, it's hard for me too. But these nights are God's blessing to me. These nights almost feel like a little secret hideaway between only me and God. I can escape the worries, doubts, frustration, hurts, insecurities... and live for only a couple of songs fully enveloped in His love.
     So, find your nights. It may be the same as me sitting in a car at 12:30 am crying and singing at the top of my lungs or it could be those moments when you're home alone and go to sit outside. They could even not even be at night, it could be when you have that extra hour in the morning when you first wake up before you go anywhere. These nights don't happen all the time, but God always makes sure to bring them back up throughout you're life in the moments that you need it the most. So go out and find your nights.


  "Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you..." (James 4:8a)


   - Rachel